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An ice cream flavor approach to temperament

By on April 1, 2011

Temperament is a psychological construct first developed by Stella Chess, Alexander Thomas and others in the 1950s born out of longitudinal studies of infants and how temperament influences adjustment throughout life.  Temperament refers to characteristics that are innate to the child from infancy as opposed to characteristics that are learned or environmentally determined.  

 

Temperament refers to the how of behavior as opposed to the “what” or “how well” of ability and development.  Nor is temperament the “why” or motivation of behavior.  Temperament may be seen as the style by which a child behaves and responds when confronted with challenges and options in daily circumstances.

 

Nine traits are used to describe various types of temperament such as Easy, Difficult, and Slow-to-warm-up children. 

 

Babies are often categorized into one of three groups: easy, difficult, and slow-to-warm up.  Not all children can be placed in one of these groups.  Of the 40%-65% of children that fit into these patterns, 10% fall into the difficult pattern, 40% are easy, and 15% may be considered slow-to-warm-up. Although these terms may at first seem judgmental, none of the types is considered to be superior to the other.  Some types of temperament may be problematic given one set of developmental or environmental expectations, but may be well suited to others.   For a more neutral approach, I like to use an ice cream flavor metaphor.  We all have our preferences, but would agree that Vanilla is not necessarily better than Rocky Road.

 

Easy     Vanilla

Difficult Rocky Road

Slow to warm up Lemon sherbet

 

How might temperament assist with parenting?  Temperament helps to explain what you are seeing, and therefore may reduce guilt, misattribution, and ineffective parenting styles.  It may also help to identify the positive potential related to a specific temperament.  No style is uniformly negative.  Understanding temperament helps place realistic limits on adult expectations and thereby increases the chances of “goodness of fit” between the parent, child, and expectations.  When temperament is not compatible with expectations, disharmony may cause “reactive problems” such as anxiety, anger, tantrums, oppositionality and sadness.  The reactive problems are often more severe and dramatic than the temperament itself.  An appreciation of and appropriate response to a temperamental style, will not change the underlying temperament, but it can reduce reactive patterns.  When temperament equals expectations, the child experiences success and lack of stress and so does the parent.

 

For example, difficult babies (Rocky Road for our purposes) tend to be very emotional, irritable, and fussy and cry a lot. They may have irregular eating and sleeping patterns.

 

Slow-to-warm-up (Lemon Sherbet) babies have a low activity level, and tend to withdraw from new situations and people. They may be slow to adapt to new experiences but accept them after repeated exposure.  Imagine this scenario; an outgoing and energetic mother (Mocha Almond Fudge) has a Lemon sherbet (slow-to-warm up) baby. Mother likes new people, new situations, lots of variety, and her baby protests loudly during her preferred daily adventures. There is the potential for a temperamental mismatch between parent and child.

 

When a parent appreciates that her child is a different flavor from his or herself, simple strategies  may be implemented that increase the chances of “goodness of fit.”

 

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